September 1, 2009

The Greatest Home School Tool Ever Is…

"What curriculum do you use?"
"How do you teach to all of the different ages?"
"Do you have summer break like the rest of us?"

These are examples of many of the questions that we home school moms get by other moms who don't home school. It is a mystery for those on "the other side", and quite frankly it is still a mystery to me. I am forever a student in this homeschooling journey. Forever being taught by the hands of the Father to love more deeply, understand more fully, grow more in patience - everyday. And I still have- oh, so much to learn.

Yet, a question that I got recently from another mom which really got me thinking was,
"What is the best tool that you have found to help you with homeschooling?"

The best tool?...I pondered. HMMM…. It's easy to think about all of the different curricula that I have used, or the various learning tools - the board games, card games, songs, CDs and manipulatives…and the books. Ohhh…the books. I love books… and there are so many good ones - GREAT ones. In fact, we just got done reading Narnia and my kids from ages 10 - 5 did not want to put it down. They could've had me reading all night long without snack breaks, potty breaks, nothing. "The best book ever!" they all said. And the symbolism linked with Christ was just awesome….okay, enough of that…sorry, I obviously loved it too. Back to the discussion…but no matter how great Narnia is and my Snap It Up math games; these are not the BEST tools.

What is the best tool then? I thought about other resources - those tricks of the trade that we all use to help us to manage our homes - assignment lists and chore charts, laundry folding hour (or two…or three…), big kids reading to little kids, etc., etc., hiring a cleaning lady (oops did I say that!)…and the list goes on.

As great as these things are, the answer goes deeper than that. I thought about this home school network and the support of other home schooling moms and classes and coops and how wonderful these can be. I contemplated the richness of our faith and how much I love the Catholic Church and its teachings and how it is such a joy to share it with my children. Yet it even must go further than the community and further than our faith because our entire faith community and the entire Catholic Church, Mary, the Saints, the whole Catechism, are meant to lead us to Jesus. For it is Jesus who is pure love. Therefore having Jesus in our hearts - and receiving Him each morning- is the most important tool as a homeschooling mother.

Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness. (Lamentations 3:22-23).

And the wonderful thing is that Jesus is available to each one of us everyday in so many forms. We find Him in Holy Scripture, through prayer, and in the quiet of our hearts. For He commands us in Psalm 46:10: Be still and know that I am God. Yet it is I who must choose to stop and be still.

We find Jesus in each precious member of our families - in our husbands and in our children, in our friends, in strangers, and in the check out lady at the grocery store. We find Him in the richness of Church tradition and of course, in the Sacraments. We find Him everyday in the Eucharist. Everyday we can become bone of his bone and flesh of his flesh (Genesis 2:23). Everyday we can become united with the God-man Jesus in the Eucharist. Everyday we can become His bride through dining at his table. Arise, my darling, my beautiful one, and come with me (Song of Songs 2:10). This bread is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world (John 6: 51). And as the physical union between man and wife brings forth new life, the physical union of Christ and his Bride, the Church (who is comprised of each one of us), through the Eucharist, brings forth new life…new life in Christ. For whoever is in Christ is a new creation: the old things have passed away; behold, new things have come (2 Corinthians 5:14-17).

Regular confession allows us to experience Christ's mercy and eternal love. Living out our marriage sacraments in love and in union with Him allows our marriages to become a living sacrament for one another and for the broader community. Participating in Baptisms, First Communions and Confirmations with our children brings forth God's graces and love and the gift of the Holy Spirit in new ways.

The Holy Spirit can bring forth Jesus into our daily lives and into hearts every moment of the day. For it was Jesus himself who said, "It is for your good that I am going away. Unless I go away, the Counselor will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you (John 16: 7)." Webster's definition of counselor is one who gives instruction in order to direct the judgment or conduct of another. God knows I need this…Oh, please, direct me Lord, I so often pray. Webster also defines counselor as an advocate who is someone who pleads on another's behalf. How wonderful it is that we have the third person of the trinity pleading on our behalfs, standing for us and with us on this home school journey. Jesus knew that he had to go to the Father in order for His power, grace and love to be unleashed in our hearts, in the hearts of his disciples, if we are open to it. For when, he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth. (John 16: 12). I need this truth! Thank God that we have the Holy Spirit to lead us there.

I often think of the Blessed Mother and of how she must have mothered. Not much is told to us in Scripture about the childhood of Jesus and about her experience parenting him. Yet in the several passages where Jesus and Mary are seen together during his early years (at his birth and at the finding in the temple), we are told that Mary pondered things in her heart (Luke 2: 19 & 51).

Just as Mary pondered Jesus - who He was and what His actions told her about Him, we, too, are called to ponder each one of our children - who they are and how best to work with and love each of them. This spirit-led pondering can then guide our choices and give us wisdom and truth about what academic tools to use or not use, what books to read or not read, what prayers to pray or not pray, what chores to expect or not expect, and what classes to signup for or not sign up for. It can guide us as to when we need to let go of "school" for the day, or even for the week, in order to just play duck-duck goose, snuggle, sing, laugh and dance with our four year old, who needs it so very much. Holy Spirit pondering can prompt us to rake leaves and jump in them together, to sit silently in Adoration together, or to play music and sing in joy while we do the dishes together.

Not only do we see Mary pondering Jesus - who he was and what he needed, but at the wedding of Cana, Mary nudges Him into action. She is prompted by the Holy Spirit to say to her son. "Jesus, there is no more wine." Yet even Jesus himself does not seem to want to act at first. "What does that have to do with me, woman?" he asks. Yet, Mary trusted in the Holy Spirit and nudged her son anyway by turning to the servants and saying, "Do whatever he tells you (John 2: 5)"

We all can relate to the need to sometimes give our children nudges even when they resist - can't we? Yet it is only through that intimate relationship with Jesus and that openness to the Holy Spirit that we can hear and know when the right time is to nudge and when it is not.

Can you also relate to being the one who typically gets "promptings" before your male counterpart? This was the way it was with Mary and Jesus at Cana and it is often times the way it is with our spouses. That's because God created "woman" to receive. Everything about us both physically and emotionally is designed that way. It's just innately easier for us… Yet, Mary could not receive first from the Holy Spirit without having that continuous union with the Father and an open, listening heart.

After saying a very long, "HMMMM…," I finally answered her question. I said, "The best tool that I have found in home schooling is God's grace and my relationship with Him." That seemed to encompass everything that I had thought about…and God's grace is poured into us through the Holy Spirit and through Jesus Christ, His Son, who comes to us in so many forms everyday. He longs for us to use Him as our greatest tool so that He in turn can use us as His greatest tools. He needs us just as we need Him. He needs us to bring His power and love into the world and in order to do this we need to receive Him. If we say that we do not have time for this then we are spending too much time with the other home schooling tools. Yet, if we choose instead to spend time with Jesus first - to pray everyday, sit quietly and listen, to receive Him through the Eucharist, the Sacraments, Holy Scripture, and the gift of the Holy Spirit, then it is He will lead our choices and give us truth about what other tools to use in home schooling… and it is He who always knows best…

"For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,"
declares the LORD.